17 Ways You Know You're A Sleep-Deprived Mum
Sleep. You just don’t realise how important it is until it’s taken away from you, do you?
And yes of course we understand what we’re signing up to at the start of it all, but no one and nothing can prepare you for the pure shock of your nighttime sleep being reduced from a healthy 8 hours (8 hours!!) to being woken up every hour, on the hour, by a tiny human that doesn’t understand that MUMMY NEEDS TO SLEEP!
So are you a sleep deprived mum?
If you nod your head to three or more of the following then yes – welcome to the (not so exclusive) club.
- You put your keys in the refrigerator. Sure where else would you keep them?
- You pour coffee into the baby’s bottle.
- And breastmilk into your coffee.
- You carry around an imaginary baby when she’s actually asleep in her moses basket in the next room.
- You forget how to speak.
- Pyjamas are now your daily attire. You get ‘dressed up’ in a tracksuit when you really, really need to leave the house.
- One glass of wine sends you to sleep in 0.4 seconds.
- You only last through the first 5 minutes of a movie before passing out.
- A shower really is just Too. Much. Effort.
- You forget where you’re going twenty minutes after setting off in the car.
- You have approximately four heart attacks every day because you think you left your baby behind somewhere.
- You have left your baby behind somewhere.
- You find yourself saying things like ‘Last night was amazing – he slept for a whole 2 hours in a row. It feels incredible!’
- You go to bed at the same time as your child.
- You might consider going out for a drink in about four years time. If you’ve actually caught up on your sleep by then. Maybe.
- Your greatest desire isn’t a fancy holiday or a new car. It’s an empty bed, clean sheets and no alarm clock. Pure bliss. Well, we can dream, can’t we? (Actually no, we can’t, because you need to be asleep for that dammit…’).